We as Americans hurt our men by making them disconnect from their emotions at a young age in order to uphold a social image. Expecting them to harbor and suppress the very same human feelings we allow women to openly express. Later in life causing many men to explode from pain and act out in some form of violence whether it’s to themselves or others. The documentary The mask you live in, backs this argument. Honestly, this film made me cry like 3 times. I’m happy I didn’t watch in class. It made me feel concerned because the words these men speak and the statistics shown are our reality. To see that woman have to pick through emotionally unstable men to find a good companion is terrifying. I feel protective because I have a son and I don’t want him to experience this lifestyle. I want him to be free. On the flip side, I feel extremely guilty because I too am a slight member in preparing my son for society. Telling him things like you’re okay; shake it off, when he falls. Or when he has a conflict at school, I first ask him if he told the teacher? When he replies no, I ask him: Did you at least hit him back so he knows not to mess with you again. It’s terrible because I’m not a violent person but I expect him to defend himself when I can’t be there to do it for him.
This argument makes me think our boys are doomed. Unless we ALL start to teach boys to be themselves throughout life and that it’s okay to express how they feel as we do girls. It’s explained perfectly what the issue are and many ways to correct them but are we really going to listen? I think not. I think moving forward we won’t be as hard on boys but there is still an image to uphold as a “Man”. The word Man in American culture signifies so many strong qualities such as, being the protector, being physically strong so that no one can push you around, and being brave and never letting someone see how you truly feel in order to not appear week. I believe that not until we start seeing images of more men being emotional while still being respected, things will never change. As a woman, the argument in this film makes me want to change the standard in which I view men. I honestly can’t imagine not crying or being emotional when that’s the way I truly feel. I couldn’t live in an untrue life of not wearing my heart on my sleeve, as we expect our men to do. They too should be allowed to be human. It’s almost as if we want men to be heartless machines but then when they act out and do heartless things because they’re so disconnected from emotions, were all clutching our pearls pointing the finger. Never once taking responsibility for our expectations to begin with.
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The Media plays a large part in the way woman are perceived. Teaching the world that women's looks are most important instead of her education or acomplishments. This makes it hard for woman to fight against being looked at as a sexual object and therefore are constantly chasing perfection. This argument in the film Miss Representation can be easily be up for debate but I agree with it 100 percent. The worldwide perception of women makes me feel angry and ashamed. I feel it’s completely unfair to expect someone to physically look a certain way when we as humans have no control over the attributes we are given at birth. It pisses me off even more that woman are adhering to these fake beauty guidelines when no one rarely cares or speaks on how a man should look. I’m ashamed because as a woman, I aide this terrible movement just to fit into society standards. I’m always worried about how I look in order to fit the part, making sure to look nice and put together even when I feel like shit. Always making a mental note to not be “busted” in order to keep my “beauty privilege” as well as being perceived in a good way because after all, Grand-momma always said nobody likes an unkept woman. When really, my voice and actions should be enough.
This argument makes me think that it’s something wrong with the female species. I’m confused as to why we are fighting so hard to be equals when woman have proven time after time that we are just as smart and good as men. Woman in America outnumber the Men so why don’t woman rise up TOGETHER and change the game for the better, once and for all? Just as fast as I thought of that question, I already have the answers as stated in the film. It’s because we have already been brainwashed into thinking of ourselves as objects first. The argument proves this stating how woman are still to this day being brainwashed through the media. Being the reason why women try to out pretty one another, why women fight over men and work full days and go home and play 1950’s housewife as if it’s a breeze. It’s sad. It makes me want to change myself in order to be a better role model for my daughter. Although I teach her to love her image in her natural state and applaud her smartness and her voice, I noticed that I still am a secret victim of the worlds standards. I want to expose the media and shine light on normalcy in body type as well as highlight female brilliance and achievements. It would be awesome to share how great woman are and to have woman see and support one another, rather than tearing each other down. Home Page Well-Being Assessment: Sustaining
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How Assessment: I will commit to complete and fix this page by April 1st 11:59pm Have you ever been apart of something but never given thought to the fact that you self consciously conform and adjust to belong? I’ve noticed this in my English 100 course, my secondary discourse community. Inside of this community we have a list of values and goals on how we should act to achieve these goals. We’ve read work by James Paul Gee to get a better understanding of what it means to be a part of a discourse community. We’ve also read very relate-able Poetry by Pablo Neruda. Overall, we are evaluating ourselves to identify our true author identities. Below are my thoughts so far on the Discourse Community I belong to. Our discourse community is so cool. Although it’s been a chore for me to properly keep up due to life, procrastination, and bad time management, this community amazes me. I’m impressed at how we all are COMPLETELY DIFFERENT in every race, shape, personality, and mindset. Yet, still have the common goal of furthering ourselves in life through education. We support one another’s thoughts and encourage each other’s processes by provide brief therapy to one another and constantly showing genuine love without necessary loving each other. Connecting and Relating while coming together from different parts of the world with different upbringings, still able to successfully function is exactly what makes this discourse community so cool.
Naturally being in this secondary discourse community, we are expected to behave in a particular way. Being attentive and giving feedback are just two ways. This seems to happen very organically and It’s thanks to our professor and the layout of the course. In our discourse community, our number one goal is to make meaning and to find our Author Identity. I believe our professor is strategically helping us achieve this by simply wanting us to “cultivate joy in writing and learning”. By simply wanting just this, I believe he makes us very comfortable to produce literature without being judged. I’ve taken English courses before and it’s amazing how honest I am in this community. How much more I get onto a page just knowing I can be free versus my work getting chewed up line by line. It’s so weird that in our discourse community, for me, this is the first time that my community is allowed to be apart of my work by having a public blog. It lets my community be a part of me finding my author Identity and I them. Rather than being in a Discourse community with my classmates while also inside of a secret discourse community with the professor. I’m very appreciative of belonging to this Discourse community and I can’t wait to see how this course will affect the way I start to speak, the things I start to do, and who I become as an author! My Narrative allows me to travel and reconnect with the unsettling emotion I felt during that time. Looking back on this very personal snapshot of my life is hard for me because I feel I am no longer the person I was during that time. My story was about me wanting an abortion. Although I had no proof of pregnancy, I still knew I was pregnant and shallowly wanted an abortion anyway. At this moment I am still pro choice because I adore women and feel certain self decisions should not warrant an explanation. However, at this moment I regret trying to throw something so beautiful and precious away because I have met so many families and women who want babies and can’t have them. It’s a very touchy story. The topic on abortion alone causes worldwide and even presidential debates. Revisiting this story allows me to explore the emotions in my heart because I felt so strong about my decision to get my baby aborted. Although It was 5 years ago, I still remember the way I felt: Pure selfishness and the determination to not let anyone stop me. The crazy part about my heart currently is although I still remember my determination, it breaks my heart to see I wanted to get rid of a piece of me that I cherish so much. I feel embarrassed. I believe my narrative could use some revision but not too much because I wouldn't want to take away the authenticity by down playing certain parts of the story. It was very hard writing this because I believe it shows a selfish side of myself. Although I don’t believe that I’m an evil or malicious person, this story can count as a character flaw. It took great nerve writing this and I think the narrative meets the element of meaningful story telling. This narrative allows me to unlock what I try to hide deep in my thoughts. I totally forget about this story at times because of how full of love I feel now. Then, I was scared and unsure of myself when I actually thought: I was sure of myself. There was also no room for love because I wanted to kill it before I gave it a chance. I think life events and stories we tell about ourselves shape our sense of identity. Life events are what make us, us. The uniqueness in each of us is the reason we all have different identities. However, I do believe the stories we tell ourselves play a major role in the identity process. We as humans have the choice of lying to ourselves about what really took place and believing and living in those lies; Or we can be completely honest with ourselves and grow from the stories, generating better selves. Maybe even provoking honesty in others. |
Tiffany swanI will use this blog to express my thoughts, creativity, and lust for life through literature. Archives
May 2019
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